THE SCRATCH SHEET Vol

THE SCRATCH SHEET Vol.5,

May 14, 2006

IN THIS ISSUE

A. News and Notes

B. The Sehl Chronicles

C. A Message from John Few

D. Answers to Trivia in SS #4

E. Some Photos

A. NEWS AND NOTES:

-Founder’s Day this year is Saturday, May 20. At this moment, we are aware that John Hagerty, and John Houghton plan to attend. Hagerty is bringing his daughter to see the place she has often heard about. Houghton is accompanying his brother who is part of the 50^th reunion class. We hear that Ben Bertino, Joe Frigiola, and John Kane plan to take part in the Alumni Golf Outing on Friday, May 19. If you are interested in participating in the outing give John Kane a call.

-We now have acquired a number of filmed or taped items which we are consolidating on one DVD. It will include: 1) the film of the Hum which was made in our senior year; 2) the film of the Hum made in 1948; 3) film of Harry Truman’s visit to the Hum in 1948; 4) Harold Cohrs’ video of our 25^th reunion. The films are not in great shape, especially the sound, but we feel they are well worth having. We expect the DVD will cost around $20 per copy. Look for an announcement in the next few months.

-The internet users in the class got a copy of Matt Mill’s retirement announcement a few months ago. (It is attached for the hard-copy guys.) Well apparently that retirement was a big mistake. Matt just underwent bypass surgery. But he is doing fine now. Get back to work, Matt!

-The Class of ’60 gift fund continues to grow. A number of classmates have volunteered annual pledges through our 50^th reunion. As usual information on the fund is available from Toby Caplan. During 2005 a number of our classmates have made substantial contributions to one or another of the numerous Girard College development funds, most of them made multiple donations. Among the donors were John Myers, Max Page, Art Garfein, Nelson Mishkin, Pete Shoemaker, Rich Adams, Byron Orrs, Don Ratajczak, and Myron Caplan. If we missed your name we apologized. It was a long list, and very small type that needed to be reviewed.

-Our website, www.Girard1960.com is due for a major upgrade in the next few months. Check it out on occasion. PLEASE NOTE: We are hoping to include our class list which includes home addresses, and email addresses. If you would rather that your personal information not be included on this public forum please let us know. The list will be password protected, so only classmates can access it.

B. THE SEHL CHONICLES

Early this year we received an anonymous letter describing our life in the Hum. It didn’t take your “committee” long to figure out the author was Carl Sehl. We have since received three more postings, which combined, we have labeled the SEHL CHRONICLES. They are presented below. A number have already been distributed to “wired” classmates, and a few responses to the Chronicles follow.

CHRONICLE 1

Here is some real Hum trivia from West End to Lafayette.

West End

1. I entered in September of 1951- I was 8- Truman was President and there was a war in Korea.

2. First smells –vomit and disinfectants.

3. Governess- Verrier- stern, but rather sweet woman (Sec E)

4. First time I saw and ate a fig.

5. First time I wore a tie – Windsor or straight knot?

6. Knickers – used the garters as sling shots. The guys that were restricted wore a different kind of knickers with buckles on the legs – John Tait and Ken Hipple wore them.

7. Everyone wanted brogues, those high topped boot like shoes – much better to kick a soccer ball with.

8. The wooden merry-go-round that the biggies would spin at “G” force till you flew off.

9. What was the name of that sexy governess with the Veronica Lake hair-do? Sec. C or D.

10. Groff, the swimming coach – always wore a tee shirt and always straightening his clip board.

11. Inoculations – marching up to the infirmary to get the 3 foot long needle with the square tip. The nurses were Suter and Lister.

12. Cold remedies – the dreaded olive green pill, or the liquid that we all swore was whiskey.

13. Third grade teacher was Whitaker – very patient, nice, warm woman. Tully and Aldinger were in my class.

14. Sweigert would read to us at night, and would also hit you with a leather strap.

15. Do you remember Sarge and Nicholson – she would go in the pool with us. She wore a bathing suit. We were nude – no fair.

16. Frame – the music teacher – She directed the “Silent Night Chorus” in the left wing of the Chapel.

17. Banks – the choir director.

18. Standing in a circle in the shower room, and scrubbing the guys back in front of you with a very stiff brush. Humiliating.

19. Simms – The humorless art teacher that always wore a blue serge suit, black patent leather belt and a well worn Kleenex tucked in her waist. I never remember her entering or leaving the room, she just appeared, like a specter. She smelled like formaldehyde – scary woman.

20. Mackinaws, beanies, and brightly colored knit hats – We always got new clothes at Christmas and summer vacations.

21. President of the school was Odgers.

22. I think the tailor’s name was Shuman – He always had a tape measure around his neck and he called everyone Schultz.

23. We weren’t allowed to talk at meals until Lafayette.

24. Worst meals- Cheese fondue and “Big Bad Wolf Liver and Onions.”

25. Best meals – on vacations – Mom’s cooking.

Junior School

1. Governess Green – Pee Hole – Section 3.

2. Sunday night Bible readings.

3. Hall monitors and safeties – The captain had a red badge, everyone else a blue one.

4. Cloak rooms.

5. Grudge lines – Standing in a corner for a half hour to an hour – I’d rather get paddled – at least it was over with.

6. The sand tent.

7. Boy scouts.

8. Ghost Riders in the Sky.

9. Bed wetting.

10. The auditorium where we saw “They died with their boots on” –Errol Flynn- “A Walk in the Sun” about 10 times –“Citizen Kane_

11. The Christmas play –“Scrooge” – that Paine directed. I still remember my two lines.

12. Stacks – the organist.

13. Tits Landis

14. Bull Dog Campbell

15. Filiwick was my 4^th grade teacher – nice woman.

16. Making blackjacks out of your hanky and killing flies.

17. Water Pistols

18. Spit Balls

19. Tooth powder in the red and white tins.

20. Gene Autry, Tom Mix, and Roy Rogers. Space Gordon, and Sky King.

21. Walter Petka in “The Pirates of Penzance” – he was great.

22. The baseball games.

Good Friends

1. Governess Varney, Section 11- Nice rack. She reminded me of Ava Gardner.

2. No more knickers –long pants- we were big shots.

3. Governess Hill, Hutchison, Duval and a guy named Swab –An ex-marine and a real sadist- always looked for an excuse to whack you.

4. Pillow fights.

5. Ginter Vurlicers playing the piano – He was really talented.

6. Going to see “Super Circus” They gave us each a quarter – We went to Horn and Hardarts on Market Street and I got coffee from a silver swan – Magic.

7. First time I jerked off – used soap – bad choice – It burned for 2 days – I thought God was punishing me. Switched to Vaseline – much more user friendly.

8. “The Robe” with Richard Burton and Jean Simmons was the big movie, and of course the classic “Singing in the Rain”

9. First time we could go home on the weekends. Car fare was 15 cents and a nickel for a token.

10. School trip to Bryn Athyn.

11. If we were good we could listen to Gunsmoke, and the Green Hornet on the radio after lights out.

12. Geckler was my 5^th grade teacher – He walked like a duck, but a kind and gentle man.

13. Barrett was the woodshop teacher – He had one thumb.

14. Playing knuckles – I always wound up with bunch of red cards.

15. Dentist pass to the mad Russian Merienko –AHHH

Lafayette

1. Section 26 –Geckler – housemaster.

2. Dandois – my 6^th grade teacher – one of the best teachers in the Hum.

3. First time using an ink pen – It was a Webber and it was the kind you had to fill from an inkwell. What a mess.

4. Vespers on Sunday nights with Dunkle.

5. Section rivalries in soccer, basketball and baseball – great fun.

6. Dodge Ball.

7. The ball attached to a rope we hit with paddles.

8. The guy with the cardboard megaphone – what was his name? We used to line up on the playground and he would bark out orders.

9. We could talk at the dinner table.

10. Got coffee and fried eggs for the first time. The fried eggs always had that black lace around them.

11. Grace before every meal.

12. Kosincheck – a law student and part-time housemaster. – He ate 13 hard boiled eggs for breakfast one time.

13. Ogden – Kind of a strange guy – I think he was a housemaster.

14. Guys with pet hamsters.

15. Willie Mays was a rookie.

16. Stan Musial was my favorite ball player.

17. Cooper was the President of the Hum. Chrome Dome.

18. The big songs were “Earth Angel”, “How Much was that Doggy in the Window” and “Tennessee Waltz”, and there was a new guy coming up named Elvis Presley.

19. Whittington stealing silverware to make a tank.

20. The baseball games.

21. Skrobiak and Sehl sharing the home run crown – each winning a bat presented by Dunkle.

22. I think Section 25 won the championship.

23. 23. A lot of good ball players – Knobby Walsh, Popella, Petka, Mills, etc.

It’s amazing some of the minute details you can remember from 50 years ago – to me the Hum was a combination of “Tom Brown School Days” and “Lord of the Flies,” and those memories will be with you till the day you die.

I’d like to pay a special tribute to Manny Sheitleman. I was saddened to hear he passed away several years ago. Manny was a quiet, unassuming guy. He always stood by his beliefs and never backed down from anyone or anything. There was always a quiet nobility about him. It was only in retrospect that I really appreciated him. I’ll miss you Manny and you’ll never know what an impact you had on me.

CHRONICLE 2

Dear Rocco

It was great hearing from you the other day. I should have known you would have smelled me out. You could spot the pimple on a fly’s ass from a mile away. I was also heartened to hear that the Vicar, Bill Evans, still hasn’t lost his acerbic edge. And that Dennis Gries- God, He’s a walking encyclopedia. You three should start your own detective agency. As you can see I’m still printing – all those cursive and calligraphy lessons were for naught, sorry Dorothy Dandois- you tried. And as for computers- they’re the devil’s work.

Now I’m going to shed some light on some lingering questions that the class of “60” had all these years.

1. Yes guys, Gimp Nehrig murdered Howie the projectionist. Think back on the night we were watching Tarantula – (or as Beaky Cunningham called in Tar an tool A). Half way through that heart tugging epic of spiders gone bad the film broke – as I leaned back to yell “Yo Howie” I noticed the limping, cowled figure going toward the projection booth. Moments later there was a blood curdling scream- and Howie was never seen again – what happened to the body? Do you remember those $300 Bostonians Gimp had. He stuffed Howie in his left shoe and disposed of the body. God knows where.

2. Yes guys, Ronald McDonald is really the illegitimate son of Donald Ratajczak.

3. Cas McGregor, our beloved English teacher, committed suicide. He was eliminated in the first round of a spelling bee and just couldn’t cope.

4. Jim Stidham married Maggie Magee, his heart throb in the senior year. They were married in a simple ceremony with only close friends attending, 3 months after graduation. But Maggie, that fickle bitch, after only 6 months of marriage, ran off with her old dancing partner, Keene. Cheer up Stidham, there’s other fish in the sea. Besides, she always looked like a parrot with a fright wig. You can do better.

5. Vic Evans- I hate to break this to you, but Hutchison and I had a steamy affair in Good Friends. After lights out, when you were choking your lizard, Huchy would draw me into her room and commit unspeakable acts on me. What a woman. She was shallow, sophisticated and filthy- God I love those qualities in a woman.

6. Ed Miller is a stowaway on the Pluto space probe. I guess we won’t see Ed till our 300^th reunion.

7. Whittington was in reality, a housemaster. He was planted in our class by Newbold Cooper to spy on us. How else could you explain why he was shaving in Junior School- I saw right through that canard. If it wasn’t for him getting caught stealing silverware in Lafayette, who knows how long he would have fooled us.

8. Rich Adams and Al Bullock are still fighting over the royalties to the book and film “The Man Who Would be King.” Both claiming it was their life story – the jury is still out on that one.

Well guys, that’s it for now. But I’ll fill you in on more juicy tidbits in later editions.

Your demented classmate

Carl Sehl

CHRONICLE 3

That second missive was just meant for a few guys with an off the wall sense of humor like myself. So feel free to trash the whole thing.

Now, Rocco that whole incident of the 22-0 or 25-0 drubbing you received in Junior School. Completely vanished from my memory. (Probably a result of decades of imbibing too many Bourbon Manhattans) and was only rekindled in the last Scratch Sheet. I did receive quite a chuckle though of your somewhat spurious account of that infamous day. Talk about drawing the long bow. I especially liked your line-up. Rumor has it that you’ve been seen on many a balmy spring day reliving the play by play. “If I only put Singer in center field instead of first base. If I made Fogarty catcher instead of second base. If I didn’t try to get my Scroogie past Carl, that he sent half way to Connie Mack Stadium.” Get over it big guy. It isn’t as if you were a Frenchman at the Battle of Agincourt. And who knows, we might have a rematch in that big baseball diamond in the sky.

And also, believe it or not, I wasn’t that offended by your omission of my name as co-recipient of that most prestigious award the Hum has to offer- the Home Run Champ of Lafayette. I now make it official: my forgiveness of your most mean spirited crime against humanity.

Now I’m just going to list a few more observations, and pieces of trivia that I omitted in my first letter.

1. That “Rite of Spring” when Seaman and Malumphy walked around the ledge of the armory- was that a cry for help or just adolescent daring.

2. Govvy Duval was the model for “Church Lady” on SNL.

3. Do you remember Noll? He was an Elvis wanna-be. He always had his collar up, and played air guitar.

4. Jackson- that terminally ill natured fellow. I always thought he was the Anti-Christ.

5. Do you remember the term “Chickie”. I’m not sure but I think it meant there was a housemaster or governess lurking nearby. And a “Chickie guard” was the one who shouted “chickie!”

6. Did I mention the Russian dentist, Merienko? – Who created “Crime and Punishment” on all our mouths at one time or another. Getting a tooth drilled by him was like getting a rectal exam by Edward Scissorhands. Ouch.

7. Norm Chachkin and his pet hamster Sparky. It seems that Sparky went for Norm’s throat one night when Norm tried to feed him cheese fondue. Sparky being a precocious rodent and an ex-marine thought Norm was trying to poison him. And it was kill or be killed. Semptor Fi, Sparky.

8. And of course, you all know how much more mature I was than the rest of you. When we were in Junior School, Rocco D’Amico had a Howdy Doody lunch box, and I had a “Death of a Salesman” lunch box. I rest my case.

So take that you Machiavellian, manufacturer of misinformation.

P.S. Here is some real Hum Trivia that Dennis Gries may want to get on. This is for real Dennis.

1. What famous American abstract expressionist went to Girard? I don’t know if he graduated but he attended. He was born in 1910, so if he did graduate it would have been the class of 1927 or 28. His paintings are worth millions today. And he rubbed elbows with Jackson Pollack, Wm. deKooning, Robert Motherwell, David Smith etc.

2. What famous President, before he was President, visited Girard? On a layover on his way to NY he stopped and visited the Academy of Music and Girard College.

50 points for the first one. 20 for the second.

CHRONICLE 4

As to the skit on Don Ratajczak in my 2^nd letter-can you picture two more disparate people than Don and Ronald McDonald- talk about an oxymoron. Thus the whole point of the joke. There was a little sarcasm in Cas’ skit because he traumatized quite a few students-he equated being a poor speller with being a failure in life. If only he knew that one his heroes, JFK, was a terrible speller. In the early 70s, a hummer wrote an article that appeared in the magazine section of the Sunday Inquirer. His remarks about Cas were all but flattering.

The sensitivity issue has stymied John (Houghton) and me. We both feel that in a way it would be like turning the “Simpsons” into the “Brady Bunch”. Our class was made up of a potpourri of personalities. The intellects were certainly important and well-respected. But we all needed the Vic Evans-Diorios- and the other clowns to lighten things up. They were the Voltaires and Woody Allens- A much needed safety valve. Variety made our class interesting.

The great ones in history, from Ben Franklin, Abe Lincoln to Churchill, Einstein, Truman, etc., etc. all had one thing in common. They could laugh at themselves. In my tribute to Manny, the one thing I failed to mention was a self-effacing sense of humor.

You seem to be given the onus of homogenizing our class Rocco, and who is “the committee?” It smells of the inquisition.

The passing of our classmates was almost surreal to me because the last time I saw most of them was when they were 17 or 18 and full of beans. It’s one of the cruel penalties of life, and each one was so important to our class as a whole.

Bob Kelly (Kell) was one of my roommates in the senior year. He was one of the quiet ones. It wasn’t long before he got caught up in the lunacy of some of our roommates and could whip out some wicked zingers of his own. He was a straight arrow. What you saw was what you got. No pretense. No guile. Just a solid guy you could count on in just about any situation. His hard work and determination also made him one of the best divers in our class.

We’ll all miss you Kell – you were taken much too soon.

EARLY RESPONSES TO THE CHRONICLES

From Bill Evans:

Upon numerous re-readings I thanked the Good Lord for letting me retain some of the grey matter that I have previously squandered in taprooms and upholstered sewers around the world. I had completely forgot about Miss Hutchinson. She along with Mrs. Cox, Miss Varney, and Pat Braun gave me many blue-veined, pre-pubescent and pubescent morning and evening woodies. The outcome was a finished product that ended in my sweating palm. Oh, how could I forget Miss H?!

Looking back, Sehl was a real enigma as well as being a gem of a fellow; used to laugh a lot with him. One time in high school, we were sent to the principal, Doggie Haskell, and we started to laugh and my guffaws went straight to my bladder as I proceeded to piss my pants big time. Another memorable occasion was during phy ed and our class was doing track. For some reason we were being timed on the track in our underwear and Carl, the speedster that we was, was running so fast that his crank worked its way out of the opening in his shorts and it became exposed. Several of us cracked up to the extent that our performance did not meet the desired outcome or grade. If you talk with him, please give him my fond regards - he's one of the best!

From Bruce Seaman:

I just laughed so hard that I had to share with someone. As you may know, it takes a special girl to put up with a hummer for more than 40 years. And to this day, my wife tolerates my quirks without really appreciating their source. So, I shared Carl’s recollections with her-- and we both had a laugh. At least she understands that our childhood was totally different from other peoples’. It was no better nor worse, just different. If it weren't for the Hum, we would have had different problems to overcome, and who's to say how we would have been different? As for me, there are some things in my past that I might change if I could go back, but I can't. So, such speculation is a waste of time. I don't regret anything, and I am happy with the person I am. I just hope that my "Hum brothers" feel that way too.

Thanks for the memories,

From Pete Shoemaker

Assuming it is Carl, it’s interesting how we change. What I mean by that is that the note was very thoughtful, sense of humor, nice use of language, etc, which are not characteristics (other than great sense of humor) of my memory of Carl. Aren’t we lucky to have such fond memories?

C. A Message from John Few

Many of you will remember John Few. He was in our class from the 2^nd grade through 9^th grade. He recently contacted the Alumni Office asking about a 50^th reunion. They put him in touch with Toby Caplan, and Dennis Gries. Below is his message to Toby. Welcome back to the fold John, after almost 50 years.

OK Caplan, so I'm sitting in the parish library where I do volunteer work and hear the 4th grade kids from the Catholic grade school across the street in the playground yelling as only kids will do. I begin to watch. There are those playing on the jungle gym, swings, etc.; those hanging out doing nothing except devising plots to get themselves into trouble or trying to find a spot where they can smoke and not get caught, and those playing basketball (the playground being too small for baseball, and soccer would take up the whole lot). The mind begins to reflect back to Girard and realizes that things haven't changed all that much. As with one or two of the kids playing across the street, at the Hum I was a sissy who couldn't hit or kick a ball if I had too; there was also group that just wasn't interested in sports which was about 35% of the class and the rest were avid soccer and baseball players summer, fall, winter and spring. This reverie comes about after having read the lengthy reminiscence D'Amico and Gries sent you regarding Pepsi and the baseball fanatics during our grade school days, found in the Scratch Sheet, December 13, 2005 at www.Girard1960.com. I have to admit that it was a beautifully written piece and while the names sounded very familiar to me I can't for the life of me remember any of the leagues developed during Good Friends and Lafayette days; probably because I was practicing the piano in the afternoons. But what a memory Rocco has - I'm impressed.

I was good at a few sports at Girard, but none that were considered real sports at the time. Franco and I challenged each other on Fridays during summers at Badminton. They were ferocious battles that usually ended up with Bob winning one week and me winning the next. I was pretty also good at volleyball and continued to be into adult life until the legs gave out. And finally after five years at the Hum and being the last person picked to be on a team, I became the best slog ball player in the class. However, that was during the summer (as you recall some of us spent the summers at Girard because our mothers could not have us at home) when most of the class could not observe my feat, gosh darn it, and of course it was the last year we were allowed to play slog ball as the following fall it was considered too juvenile for us to play, or so they told us. I actually became captain of a team and I got to choose players. Ah so, short lived, but a good memory none the less.

And speaking of names, I note that Evans' comment about "ebonically morphed" current names at Girard are somewhat different then when we were there; you might want to point out to him that we had names like Atlee, Stansbury, Wesley, Salvatore, Rocco, Sterling, Nelson, Gunther, Leland, Byron and my favorite Emmanuel.. Forgive the misspelled names, after all it has been over 50 years (I left the Hum after the 9th grade) since last I saw any of these people.

Oh, by the way Rank taught 2nd grade not 1st grade as reported by one of the alumni. I was in her class along with Kane, Register, the Devlin twins, etc.

So who in the hell am I and why am I writing you after all of these years. The story is too long to tell, but there is another hummer in the small town where I live here in Northern California. Turns out he is working at a place where I volunteer and when I was introduced to him we exchanged the usual "where are you from." He responded from Philadelphia, Los Angeles, San Francisco and San Jose. I queried - really Philadelphia or a burb? His reply was "I went to Girard College, Philly Textile, etc." I listened for a while and mumbled that I had attended Girard for seven years, but did not graduate. He asked what year I would have graduated, I replied 1960, and it turns out that he graduated in 1961. I turned ashen. I have not met any Hummer since I left in 1957 and of all places a small farming community here in Northern California. He asked my last name and I was almost reluctant to tell him, but when I told him he did not remember who I was. For all that, you Myron Caplan, might not remember who I am. This in turn led to me get in contact with the alumni office who gave my email address to Dennis Gries. I have been in contact with Dennis as I was interested in information about a possible 50th year reunion. Good to be in touch after all of these years.

In peace and joy,

John Few

In defense of your editor, who claimed Ms. Ranck taught first grade. She most certainly taught 1^st, in the 49-50 year. (Pepsi come to my defense, you were there.) She may have taught 2^nd in 50-51 when I assume John entered in second grade. By then I had Ms. Hartz, followed by Ms. Wilson, Ms. Potts, Ms. Braun, and in the sixth grade “Spitfire” Ramsey. Wonderful teachers all. Spitfire was so named, because when she was angry and hollering at you, you got to partake of her bodily fluids.

D. Answers to SS#4’s Trivia Questions

1. Mr. Chester Sweigart read us The Wonder Clock

2. Mr. George Shuster, the sheet metal shop instructor married Ms. McCracken

3. Sherms was our tailor

4. Harry Blackstone was the willie, and Olga, the female willy. She was a follower of Father Divine. We had a ditty about them making out in the kitchen

a. Ms. Landis - Tits

b. Ms.Galloway - Horsey

c. Mrs. Oleine M. Turner – Banana Legs

d. Mrs. Anne G. Greene - Peehole

e. Ms. Helen R. Craig – Parrot Nose

6. Miss Janet F. Duval – The governess from hell

7. The Projected Penis-Ed Miller

8. The Shadow Puppet Master-Bob Skrobiak

9. Cas’ son was Dave McGregor-He went to Amherst

10. Harshest physical punisher. Whoever was inflicting the punishment. But Stubby Craig gets our vote.

11. Mrs. Charles“Beaky” Cunningham was “Betty Preserve.” Her husband Beaky, our guidance counselor told Gearhart to forget college and go home and farm.

12. Don’t remember the rule. Named after Dom Cermele, ’59, the current President of the Hum.

13. Youngest Graduates: a. Norm Chachkin-4/27/44; b. Sal Bovoso- 4/16/44; c. Dennis Gries-4/7/44.

14. Oldest graduates: a. Dan Walsh-7/8/41; b. Jacob Kutschera 7/27/41; Of the non-graduates: Skrobiak-1/31/41 though we think Bartrum Malumphey was born in 1940.

15. First to enter the Hum: a. Kutschera-2/5/48 (in the Hum 12 years and 4 months); b. Sam Chapman 2/9/49.

16. Last to be kicked out: Leonard Scott-Senior Year

And one new question: you can find the answer in your Corinthian.

Q. Forget Wilt Chamberlain, and Kobe Bryant: what member of our class scored 140 points in a single intramural basketball game.

E. Some Photos

1. 45^th Reunion